Friday, March 8, 2013


Sorry I know this post took a turn for the ugly and I don't normal post things like this but I just had to get that out!

I swear that month just flew by but at the same time seemed to drag on. I went back and looked and I didn't post in February on this blog and only once on the 1st on SBB. I knew being home in GA (I keep having to tell myself that Ga is not home anymore, even after 5 months) for two weeks would effect my blogging but I thought I might get something up for the month. However, here we are on March 8th and I'm finally getting pen to paper or fingers to keys I guess in this case. I really do want to become better at keeping up with this and posting at least 3 times a week. That being said I don't want to post random crap if I'm not feeling it but I feel like I do need to post more if I'm going to be successful at this and reach an audience and really grow this blog into what I want it to be. I need to get back to the gym and back to cooking and back to life in general. Ever since I've been home from GA I've just been in this funk of not wanting to do anything, I still have yet to unpack but I did manage to get some deco up on the walls (with hubby's help). I just haven't felt up to doing anything and I don't know why. I think I'm just so sick and tired of sitting at home all day and not working for 5 months. I joke and say that I wouldn't care if it was the summer cause I'd be at the pool all day but who am I kidding I hate not working and making my own money plus no one want to see me in a bathing suit all day everyday. I know I have my Mary Kay and I tell people with the biggest fake smile on my face that I love TN and working MK full-time and it's working out great but lets be real for a minute cause that's what the blog world is all about right? MK is not paying the bills it never has. Don't get it twisted I love my MK and I have no one to blame but myself for it not working, I just wish I could wake up one day and it work but I know that's no going to happen if I don't put in the effort. But right now I just want to be back in a salon full time. I miss doing hair, it's my passion, I questioned that for a while but not doing it all day everyday for 5 months now I know more than ever that it is! I feel like I'm slowly losing my mind and my intelligence over here (not that I was that smart to begin with! I can't remember the easiest stuff anymore, it took me forever the other day to do an easy math equation (and I'm good at math). I feel like the longer I sit at home in front of the TV for 12+ hrs a day the stupider I get, I can barely carry a conversation anymore cause I don't know what's its like to talk to anyone other than my husband anymore. No one calls, no one visits...

On a good note: I should be getting my car back sometime early next week. I've been looking forward to this day for months now! and I might hopefully cross your fingers be getting a JOB soon :-)

Hey White Liar...

Is there such a thing as white lies? and what if something starts out as a white lie but grow into something bigger. I know we all lie or have lied in our life but if your doing it to protect someone does it make it okay?

I found out that someone has been lying to me and I know it's to protect me but it is tearing me up inside knowing that they are keeping something from me. Do I confront this person or just let it slide? It's not life treating or super serious but it makes me question their sincerity and my trust toward them. Am I going to question everything that comes out of their mouth now? I already have trust issues with people, is this going to deepen that?

I really am at a lost of what to do and that's why I am up at 5:30 am on a Friday morning when I should be sleeping cause my mind won't slow down long enough for me to sleep.